Wednesday, October 19, 2016

B is for blue

Upon coming over to put up this post, I decided to continue my journey through the alphabet; and no, I'm not posting about the color, but the mood.


I'm sitting here feeling so damned depressed and discouraged tonight. Some neighborhood vandal has taken a delight in letting the air out of our tires, and it's the only car we have. We don't know who it is, or when they're doing it, even though we're home all the time. A few times, they've even let the air out until the tire is flat.

This has caused great problems for us, as both of us are disabled; and like I said, it's our only car. No, we don't have an air compressor at home. I just recently ordered a little cheap one from Amazon, but it didn't work, so we're having to send it back. Huge disappointment and bummer. And no, we can't keep it in the garage; door doesn't work.

We don't have money to spend on getting the tire checked, buying fix a flat, motion sensor lights, or video surveillance. Yes, I've contacted the local police, but there's not a lot they can do. They made some extra runs by your house, and things were quiet; but I guess they've stopped, and our vandal has started up again.

We have a hard enough time as it is, just making ends meet from month to month. This is just so discouraging; it's a problem we don't need. I have IBS, among other things, and all this stress just makes things worse; till sometimes I don't hardly feel like eating.

Why is someone doing this to us? We're quiet, we mind our own business, we don't bother anyone. Why do they get their jollies out of making our life harder, when it's hard enough already. Now we can't go out and do any grocery shopping until someone helps us get our tires aired up.

I so wish that air compressor had worked; we really needed it to work. The motor ran, but it didn't air anything up. In fact, the tire lost a pound of air. We have to beg for help to get the tires aired up. We need one that is good and really works good, but we can't afford a good one. All we can afford is crap that doesn't work.

Why can't things get easy for us? Why do they always have to be so hard all the time? I'm so bummed out and depressed. We both are disabled and live with chronic pain, and now to have these hassles. Some people have good luck hand over fist. We never do. Once in a while we'll have a tiny bit of good luck, here and there. But we don't get used to it, don't expect it to continue, cause we know it won't.

I'm so tired of the constant ongoing struggle. Don't know what to do, no solution. Sometimes I just want to curl up in a ball and give up. Tonight is one of those times.
-- jd --

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